Thought I might say a quick word on the whole tapering process and how things are going. And, happy to say, so far so good! I'm still taking it really, really slowly. Tomorrow is the start of the third week, so I'll be moving on to two days at a half dose, one at full. I'm a little conscious that all this hopping up and down with dosage may not be the best way to go - surely just gradually lowering the dose makes more sense? But, this is what I was advised to do, so I'll follow it, to the letter.
Overall I feel good. Really, since Christmas things have been going well. I'm enjoying life. I had a very gentle post Christmas easing back into work, and all is well at home. I'm sleeping. I'm even starting to feel concentration coming back - here's a good example. My son was put on a waiting list for an ENT appointment two years ago (yes, two YEARS). I got a call about 6 weeks before Christmas to say that they were only on the 2009 referrals, and as ours wasn't made till 2012, it would be better if we were transferred to an alternative hospital that could fit him in sooner. I hummed and hawed - said alternative hospital is over two hours drive away - but it seemed preferable to continuing to wait so I agreed. I was told that we'd be contacted within a couple of weeks with an appointment. Ha! Needless to say, we were not. So, today, I rang the alternative hospital only to discover that not only is he not on any waiting list, they don't even have an ENT department!! They suggested a sister hospital, so I rang them. Nope. Back to the original hospital. On hold. Yes, we were referred to another hospital (the one with no ENT dept), they will be in touch so don't go calling them. I tried pointing out that they had only moments before informed me of their lack of ENT service, but hey, what do I know. So now we wait. I'll give them a week before I start causing serious heartache for someone!!
Anyway, the point of all this rambling. The very fact that I even remembered to check up on what was happening, never mind chase it across three different hospitals (albeit without getting a definitive answer - yet) is such a sign that things are improving. It hadn't even occurred to me till Hubby pointed it out, but he's right. I'm coming back to myself.
Last night, after getting the kids to bed, I finally, finally got my act together and made lunches for the week, as well as a batch of healthy(ish) muffins - you all know how much I love cake. It felt so good this morning to get up knowing that I was prepared for the week, and instead of running around in circles feeling under pressure like we usually do, we actually got out of the house on time, with no repeated roaring at the kids to wash their faces/put on their shoes/brush their teeth etc etc etc.
It feels good. I'm enjoying the focus. I'm enjoying being able to go out with a few friends and just have the craic. I'm enjoying planning my next tattoo with Hubby!! I want it to last. I'm scared that it won't, I'm scared that it's just going to be a brief, glorious interlude. But even if that's all it is, it's a lot more than I had a year ago, and I'm hopeful that it will keep getting better.
Labels: concentration, focus, hope, Medication, relationship, stability, tapering, treatment