Here's what I don't want to do today -
- clean my kitchen, again
- make a shopping list
- do the shopping
- fight with my kids over homework/tv/ds/chocolate blah blah blah
- drive back into town at 9.30 this evening to collect Hubby from work
- sort out car service
- sort out ongoing financial crap
Here's what I want to do -
- ................................... (could be translated to either sit and stare at the walls or sleep)
Form is shocking, absolutely shocking. I cancelled coffee with a friend this morning, made excuses with another this afternoon. I feel completely and utterly overwhelmed. I have a list as long as my arm of things I need to do, both work and blog related, and I don't have time to do any of them. Or rather, I feel I don't have time. At work, I just can't keep up right now. At home, all I seem to be doing is firefighting. I'm back to feeling guilty ALL THE TIME. I've promised writing to a couple of people, I haven't yet managed to do it because I feel guilty if I sit down to do it while the kids are here during the day, or else if I'm ignoring Hubby in favour of the laptop in the evening (I appreciate the irony of saying this while sitting down writing a post in the middle of the day, but it's that or my head will explode). I've so much I want to do for Please Talk, but I cannot find the time. I'm not seeing Therapist next week, always, always sets me off. I feel like I'm running around in ever smaller circles and getting nothing at all done.
I hope to christ this is pms. I suspect it is. Whatever it is, it would want to pass really, really, soon because it feels like utter shite.
Labels: agitation, angst, behaviour, mood